old times

As i started up my car, - same one since highschool, a song on the radio came on that i used to love - from highschool. and i had on my same puffy jacket i got for my birthday - in highschool. i had a weird thought... what if i was back in highschool! how have I changed? considering i have come full circle to end up not really going anywhere at all to be literally in the same shoes as i was five years ago. It was kinda of creepy.
Perhaps the only difference is that I can get away with ranting more than i used to. now that i am one of the educated/beautiful people getting ready to graduate. i fooled them all! There is a certain amount of cockiness that being 23 affords you. i just hope i don't morph from being cocky to cock-like. The ultimate punishment of old age.

back to the saga of nothingness. i am perfectly content to curl up with my book and my kitty (that i tamed).
more nothingness. i had a weird and very vivid daydream of vampires. So watch out for the blond chick with the knife.. she's sportin some badass fangs! and why would a vampire need a knife? much less three of them. The vampie was also lost and confused. not very intimidating

more torture...

waging fear
to cure the consciousness
of objections to violence.
Legitimized only by the notion
that the fear holds truth, that
Fear of my death justifies another's
or fear for my house
my car, my money, my...
way of life.
And so I feel fear
reached by a manipulated consensus
of conclusions by propoganda
to create a feeling I didn't know i had
we had, they had.
We've Been had.
Fear permeates society
its the, CIA see?
the KGB, Nazi, paramilitaries
waging fear
on truth.
Secret detention camps
soccer stadiums, electric shocks
blindfolds, basements, blood
spilled
another killed
another filled - with hate, too late
to save a life - but not a truth
Let it speak!
Manipulation is not the ugly side of peace.
Torture can never be justified.
Waging peace does not mean a war of violence,
Let it speak!

torture

is anyone else completely outraged by Bush's veto of the bill banning water boarding and other 'harsh interrogation' techniques condemned by international law and already previously outlawed by our very own military? A nation that sanctions torture is not worth protecting. Not only is there huuuuge moral issues, but what about the precedent that it sets? that any nation can defy international human rights laws in the name of national security? One nation's terrorist is another's freedom fighter. Or oops, perhaps we just got the wrong guy. Since they are not given a trial, and we use secret detention camps.... how much do you trust the CIA? The arguement has been proposed to me - that torture perhaps can be justified in certain circumstances if it were the last resort and if it were the only way to yield credible information preventing an attack. There is many-a-problem with this. First, there is no way of ever actually measuring this. Is it even possible to put someone in a detention camp and imprisoned while posing the idea that they are being held by a just and moral nation that will not harm or torture them? The U.S has too much bad history behind it. Second, most studies indicate that other interrogation techniques are much more successful, and moreover, testimony under torture is infactual and unreliable. (why were the tapes destroyed of the torture sessions of moussai- the name i can't spell?) Also there is so much information out there - 911 as the classic example - the problem is not that there is a lack of it. Rather there is too much. interpreting it is the hard part. The thousands of phone conversations, millions of documents, tranlations, etc. To claim that one testimony of a tortured individual is somehow more unique and valuable than the insane amount of information out there is ridiculous. Third. even if we could get info, - and only through torture, the bottom line is torture is immoral and wrong. It dehumanizes the people who do it and who they do it to. It is a crime against humanity. So Bush - Fuck you!
p.s. i put the 'adult content' thing on because it humored me. i also finally figured out how to put links up. yay for me.

ramblin away cause i'm too busy to work

that plane blog was not nearly as spooky and prophetic as i would have liked it to be. use your imagination.... or how about even more creepy is that now the head guy of Farc has been murdered by the colombian military in Ecuador and venezuela is now putting troops on the border as has ecaudor and increasing military tension have backlogged the unprecedented progress of releasing hostages and farc(ian) political prisoners. Way to go Uribe. fucked it up again. there is a march on march 6th against miltary and state violence. needless to say it is receiving quite a bit of repression and backlash. unlike the march against guerrila violence a month ago. Not that i support FARC. But their leader should not have been killed. Many other countries acknowledge tham as a political group and have a political solution. I don't really see this as possible unless there is a fundamental restructuring of the colombian government. but even that's possible. join bolivia, venezuela, argentina, chile, ecuador, nicaragua, (brazil 1/2). And all of these countries aren't even that radical. in fact nicaragua has completely outlawed abortion. yet not even a slightly progressive President has held power in Colombian... ever? its time. Perhaps then Farc's time will be up. But not now, and not even a de-escalation in violence is possible now. and Venezuela's counteraction of militarizing the border is not a solution for peace.
It would really by nice to rant all night long. I have fun with it. But what really needs to happen right now is paper writing! Too much time at the gym, too much previous studying and being a sickly child does not make for productive homework time. (brittany spears did NOT just start playing.... yes, she did)
there is a world of difference between hard lifting and just.. lifting. where's my back massage boy when i need him... I want to do a whole new blog on just working out because i have so much fun with it and my family doesn't want to hear about it. and its quite boring to anybody but me.