Just coming from the gym i realized i misplaced my sports bra with a pair of underwear. Well, that ain't gonna work, so i stumbled home now dreading to go back. It is the 'hook up hours' at the moment and i feel a little unsure whether i should be scoring a date or lifting Gym update: i am stronger on almost every machine now which is quite exciting. AND.. i can almost go from a bridge into a backflip. they almost caught me practicing which was kind of an awkward moment. i was crumpled up on the floor after not making it all the way over and tried to pretend i was stretching my back.
Now to the gym. I wonder how all these white girls get so tan? I find myself contemplating whether its spray on, or from a booth. Or maybe my albino little self is just jealous.
I had my first night of 'boxing club' at the university. It was pretty cool, and exactly what i was looking for - its free! I probably won't stick to boxing as my 'sport of passion' but its cool to have something to improve and, and a situation where i get my ass handed to me from lack of skill and being in shape. Another happy note, i started a critical thinking group with one of my friends and we had the first meeting last night. I'm really excited about it. It introduces me to good people, and gives me time to discuss real issues with people. Next week I am giving a presentation on Colombia.
miércoles, 6 de febrero de 2008
lunes, 21 de enero de 2008
university career
i sit here listening to abba - dancing queen pondering my classes and why i would love to drop out of college again and pursing higher education on my own. To their credit some of my classes are cool. Interest groups is a small class with six of us which allows for my witty jokes and my attention needy questions. Also upcoming is a 20 page paper on a lobbying group of my choice. I am leaning towards the School of Americas aka WHINSEC aka foriegn policy death squads. (three minutes have passed and i am now listening to daft punk, 'around the world'. also great music for bench pressing. on a similar unrelated topic i have come to enjoy doing my workout to classical music. there's something to be said for frenzied violin playing) moving on.
But of more importance are my three other classes. Especially the one i have just come from. The lecture from literary works. To put it simply i would have walked out after ten minutes, but familiar with tricks from irrelevant proffessors they usually intice students to stay by giving an assignment or extra credit in the last five minutes of class. so instead i amused myself with world class poetry in order to contain myself. (Madonna - material girl will background the poem writing
he stands there, shiny head and little hair
reading, feeding
pre-written biases and lies
he need not look up, for we are too ugly to even cook up
with head down, he wishes he could cry
then he raises his voice and is gesturing
the manequin broken neck is lecturing!
Like Hamlet i am sentenced
with dagger in the heart, my brain has become smart,
i stagger home for repentance
But of more importance are my three other classes. Especially the one i have just come from. The lecture from literary works. To put it simply i would have walked out after ten minutes, but familiar with tricks from irrelevant proffessors they usually intice students to stay by giving an assignment or extra credit in the last five minutes of class. so instead i amused myself with world class poetry in order to contain myself. (Madonna - material girl will background the poem writing
he stands there, shiny head and little hair
reading, feeding
pre-written biases and lies
he need not look up, for we are too ugly to even cook up
with head down, he wishes he could cry
then he raises his voice and is gesturing
the manequin broken neck is lecturing!
Like Hamlet i am sentenced
with dagger in the heart, my brain has become smart,
i stagger home for repentance
abortion law, anti choice
Now that i am no longer in colombia, i feel that i can't really call this blog ' Cassie Colombia' perhaps cassie after colombia. Or Cassie's views who was at one time in Colombia....
We come to different conclusions relating to the morality of abortion, ideas of conception, etc. This is an issue with so great a diversity of perspecitives I argue not to convince you about my values over abortion but rather that no other group or human or government should have the power to regulate the choice to have an abortion.
The idea that a government or a group's morality is greater and more important than that of a single individual is a dangerous road to take. That decisions based on the concensus of 1000 people is more rational than that of one. Not only are laws not made by concensus but rather traditionally from upperclass males. Those in power are not of the same proportion as the people they have power over.
Opression is opression is opression. I may not be muslim, black, Colombian, male, homosexual, disabled, etc. But opression is not one sided and the fight for autonomy and respect for one group cannot occur with out a fight for all. The right to privacy, the right to protest, the right to health care, education, to equality under the law, the right to live in peace, are all rights that clash with a government that begins intruding into the personal space and lives of its citizens. The right to an abortion is not a moral sanction for it, but simply a recognition that an institution is not designed to impose values. 'governments are the biggest violators of human rights'
Values are a complex and intricate system that when imposed on a large population create conflict. one may not agree with abortion, but what about female genital mutilation? How about the idea that adultery is punishable by death? Execution for using drugs? the neccesity to torture people for the security of a nation? To start a preemptive war? To not have the right to protest in the streets? To not to be allowed to worship a different God? These are all values that different men who are 'leaders' in their countries have used as tools for opression. And all of them are for patriotic reasons. Even if one believes that abortion is murder and murder should never be allowed, they must also recognize that there are those that believe that a mother's rights supercede that of her fetus. That the living are more important than the unborn. That a miscarriage is not second degree murder. That thousands of women and girls die every year in the name of 'pro life' agendas. That abortion is a personal, but difficult choice to be decided by a woman. And only one woman.
We come to different conclusions relating to the morality of abortion, ideas of conception, etc. This is an issue with so great a diversity of perspecitives I argue not to convince you about my values over abortion but rather that no other group or human or government should have the power to regulate the choice to have an abortion.
The idea that a government or a group's morality is greater and more important than that of a single individual is a dangerous road to take. That decisions based on the concensus of 1000 people is more rational than that of one. Not only are laws not made by concensus but rather traditionally from upperclass males. Those in power are not of the same proportion as the people they have power over.
Opression is opression is opression. I may not be muslim, black, Colombian, male, homosexual, disabled, etc. But opression is not one sided and the fight for autonomy and respect for one group cannot occur with out a fight for all. The right to privacy, the right to protest, the right to health care, education, to equality under the law, the right to live in peace, are all rights that clash with a government that begins intruding into the personal space and lives of its citizens. The right to an abortion is not a moral sanction for it, but simply a recognition that an institution is not designed to impose values. 'governments are the biggest violators of human rights'
Values are a complex and intricate system that when imposed on a large population create conflict. one may not agree with abortion, but what about female genital mutilation? How about the idea that adultery is punishable by death? Execution for using drugs? the neccesity to torture people for the security of a nation? To start a preemptive war? To not have the right to protest in the streets? To not to be allowed to worship a different God? These are all values that different men who are 'leaders' in their countries have used as tools for opression. And all of them are for patriotic reasons. Even if one believes that abortion is murder and murder should never be allowed, they must also recognize that there are those that believe that a mother's rights supercede that of her fetus. That the living are more important than the unborn. That a miscarriage is not second degree murder. That thousands of women and girls die every year in the name of 'pro life' agendas. That abortion is a personal, but difficult choice to be decided by a woman. And only one woman.
lunes, 7 de enero de 2008
che and ayn rand
The utopia of Che Guevara and Ayn Rand i guess technically in weirdo Russian, its pronounced 'Ain' Rand. But fuck that. in my heart she'll always be Ann.
Che Guevara was not a true communist. (he had a break with Russian Communism because he disagreed with the Stalin method of mass extermination) And Ayn Rand would not say that any capitalist system that exists in the world today is true capitalism. Perhaps i am putting words in their mouth and making my own interpretation. But thats what happens when you die. And there's not a damn thing they can do about it.
Capitalism is based on the idea of productivity and exchange. Money is simply a material form to facilitate that exchange. In Atlas Shrugged she creates a utopia that is made up of only people who excel in their creative ability, and therefore all live in harmony. There are no looters. nobody who lives for free. Gold is the standard of exchange, thus the product being sold is creativity, and expertise. What a perfect little world.
Che also imagined such a world as did many 'communists' aka community living. The making of the "new man" that in order to achieve this magical new community, the consciousness for it must be created first. A revolution of ideas must occur first before the community can be enabled. and then in this communist community people would choose their work, and that work would help sustain the community. Not because they had to, but out of love. ability is being exchanged for the ability of others. Nobody is living for free, but elderly, and sick people are allowed to live. People who cannot care for themselves, but can offer non productive things to the community, such as conversation, wisdom, advice, family honor, etc..
essentially they are the same. The flaw i see with Ayn Rand is that not all ability is productive work. what about a monk? or what if the musician Dagny loved to listen to only played for his own enjoyment? Perhaps the satisfaction many people gain from their own accomplishments are personal and do not need any recognition regardless of the type of person who could recognize it. all of the people in the Utopia withdrew their genius from society because ordinary people could not acknowledge it. But they all still wanted it to be acknowledged by someone. someone of equal caliber. For some form of exchange. is personal satisfaction a form of exchange? how do you put a price on pleasure? This is why money is only an idea. and why it is not important that in communism there is no material medium of exchange. The exchange is actions. And everybody acts. This is the making of the new man. To become self actualized. Che called for education among all the guerrillas, to read, to learn new languages, to practice the morals that you preach. To be the best person you can be. The Utopia is only as good as the people in it. And this is the fundamental difference. We exist in a world of people. And we certainly don't live in a utopia. ( i do, but only occaisonlly in my head)
Thoughts on the looney toon spectacle of Presidential debates: first off. Hugo Chavez is not Chave`z. its Cha`vez. Get it straight.
Missed half the of Republican debate, but of course illegal immigration comes up again. if it hadn't already at least five times already. The evils of illegal immigration: Huckabee says that illegals should leave, and come back legally that way they can live with their head held high. why do people come to America. overwhelming economic reasons, as well as safety and security as undeclared refugees. Build the fence! increase border patrol! deny amnesty! What are the bigger issues here? how about how other countries are dealing with immigration? Ecuador, Syria, Chad, Canada.... How did immigrants become the source of attack (again). Its called the old fear and distract tactic. Make Americans scared of an issue of little relevance using an appropriate scape goat. currently its Latin American immigrants. before it was Irish, the Itaialian, the Chinese (especially during the gold rush). which immigrants shall we fear in ten years. Canadians? other scapegoat possiblilities: Muslims, Communists, anti americans, terrorists (this one is a perfect one. just change the definition!) So now we can blame someone for the problems of the economy, and not look at the real reasons why people want to attack us. Bring on the fence.
Democrats: nuclear proliferation: Obama, i am increasingly disappointed in you. first question asked was about invading Pakistan if their was credible intelligence of al qaeda's whereabouts. after much chatter of diplomacy his and comment was, yes. he would attack pakistan if pakistan would not cooperate in the elimination of terrorists groups. because this would make america safe from the threat of pakistan's nuclear arsenal (i suppose). NO! there is never any excuse to wage war on any country. even if the 'terrorists' were residing there. Economic sanctions! Today's world is a global economy. Economic sanctions would be more effective than war. Some of the biggest reasons why international interventions (in the real name of peace - not just pretend) were because some powerfull country was supplying a group with money and weapons. For real solutions, and real peace the countries must work together to stop the flow of money and weapons to a country and... za zing! And of course not examined to any extent was the military package the u.s gave Pakistan. One of the largest arms deals in the history of America. And we wonder why pakistan is unstable and full of weapons? little trinket toys are made in china. Weapons are made in the u.s. Also of concern. Nonproliferation. I was impressed by John Edwards tonight. i have usually discarded him. Bringing up the fact that we would be safer as a disarmed world. Go John. The idea that we fear being destroyed so we create more and more weapons in order to prevent our destruction? i like this quote.... " In a perfected nuclear deterrence, the knowledge in a disarmed world that rearmament potentially means extinction would become the deterrent" There is no need for nuclear weapons.
Obama and Edwards, you constantly claim ' i am the candidate of change!' but i got distracted how many times the word ' change' was said and possibly simply didn't hear anything of substance that was said during my counting. or possibly its because nothing was said. But what are President debates really for anyways. building up those catchy one liners. And John Edwards sumed America up nicely. This Presidential race is a fight for the middle class. of course it is. Because the buffer class is most important towards keeping the war machine up and running. If nobody fights for the middle class, there will be no buffer class. They will have joined the poor classes and others around the world and have started a revolution!
Che Guevara was not a true communist. (he had a break with Russian Communism because he disagreed with the Stalin method of mass extermination) And Ayn Rand would not say that any capitalist system that exists in the world today is true capitalism. Perhaps i am putting words in their mouth and making my own interpretation. But thats what happens when you die. And there's not a damn thing they can do about it.
Capitalism is based on the idea of productivity and exchange. Money is simply a material form to facilitate that exchange. In Atlas Shrugged she creates a utopia that is made up of only people who excel in their creative ability, and therefore all live in harmony. There are no looters. nobody who lives for free. Gold is the standard of exchange, thus the product being sold is creativity, and expertise. What a perfect little world.
Che also imagined such a world as did many 'communists' aka community living. The making of the "new man" that in order to achieve this magical new community, the consciousness for it must be created first. A revolution of ideas must occur first before the community can be enabled. and then in this communist community people would choose their work, and that work would help sustain the community. Not because they had to, but out of love. ability is being exchanged for the ability of others. Nobody is living for free, but elderly, and sick people are allowed to live. People who cannot care for themselves, but can offer non productive things to the community, such as conversation, wisdom, advice, family honor, etc..
essentially they are the same. The flaw i see with Ayn Rand is that not all ability is productive work. what about a monk? or what if the musician Dagny loved to listen to only played for his own enjoyment? Perhaps the satisfaction many people gain from their own accomplishments are personal and do not need any recognition regardless of the type of person who could recognize it. all of the people in the Utopia withdrew their genius from society because ordinary people could not acknowledge it. But they all still wanted it to be acknowledged by someone. someone of equal caliber. For some form of exchange. is personal satisfaction a form of exchange? how do you put a price on pleasure? This is why money is only an idea. and why it is not important that in communism there is no material medium of exchange. The exchange is actions. And everybody acts. This is the making of the new man. To become self actualized. Che called for education among all the guerrillas, to read, to learn new languages, to practice the morals that you preach. To be the best person you can be. The Utopia is only as good as the people in it. And this is the fundamental difference. We exist in a world of people. And we certainly don't live in a utopia. ( i do, but only occaisonlly in my head)
Thoughts on the looney toon spectacle of Presidential debates: first off. Hugo Chavez is not Chave`z. its Cha`vez. Get it straight.
Missed half the of Republican debate, but of course illegal immigration comes up again. if it hadn't already at least five times already. The evils of illegal immigration: Huckabee says that illegals should leave, and come back legally that way they can live with their head held high. why do people come to America. overwhelming economic reasons, as well as safety and security as undeclared refugees. Build the fence! increase border patrol! deny amnesty! What are the bigger issues here? how about how other countries are dealing with immigration? Ecuador, Syria, Chad, Canada.... How did immigrants become the source of attack (again). Its called the old fear and distract tactic. Make Americans scared of an issue of little relevance using an appropriate scape goat. currently its Latin American immigrants. before it was Irish, the Itaialian, the Chinese (especially during the gold rush). which immigrants shall we fear in ten years. Canadians? other scapegoat possiblilities: Muslims, Communists, anti americans, terrorists (this one is a perfect one. just change the definition!) So now we can blame someone for the problems of the economy, and not look at the real reasons why people want to attack us. Bring on the fence.
Democrats: nuclear proliferation: Obama, i am increasingly disappointed in you. first question asked was about invading Pakistan if their was credible intelligence of al qaeda's whereabouts. after much chatter of diplomacy his and comment was, yes. he would attack pakistan if pakistan would not cooperate in the elimination of terrorists groups. because this would make america safe from the threat of pakistan's nuclear arsenal (i suppose). NO! there is never any excuse to wage war on any country. even if the 'terrorists' were residing there. Economic sanctions! Today's world is a global economy. Economic sanctions would be more effective than war. Some of the biggest reasons why international interventions (in the real name of peace - not just pretend) were because some powerfull country was supplying a group with money and weapons. For real solutions, and real peace the countries must work together to stop the flow of money and weapons to a country and... za zing! And of course not examined to any extent was the military package the u.s gave Pakistan. One of the largest arms deals in the history of America. And we wonder why pakistan is unstable and full of weapons? little trinket toys are made in china. Weapons are made in the u.s. Also of concern. Nonproliferation. I was impressed by John Edwards tonight. i have usually discarded him. Bringing up the fact that we would be safer as a disarmed world. Go John. The idea that we fear being destroyed so we create more and more weapons in order to prevent our destruction? i like this quote.... " In a perfected nuclear deterrence, the knowledge in a disarmed world that rearmament potentially means extinction would become the deterrent" There is no need for nuclear weapons.
Obama and Edwards, you constantly claim ' i am the candidate of change!' but i got distracted how many times the word ' change' was said and possibly simply didn't hear anything of substance that was said during my counting. or possibly its because nothing was said. But what are President debates really for anyways. building up those catchy one liners. And John Edwards sumed America up nicely. This Presidential race is a fight for the middle class. of course it is. Because the buffer class is most important towards keeping the war machine up and running. If nobody fights for the middle class, there will be no buffer class. They will have joined the poor classes and others around the world and have started a revolution!
domingo, 18 de noviembre de 2007
poem
ignorance implicates us
in its fabricated
tapestry of lies
close your eyes
and imagine this world
with out suffering, with out violence
... with out people.
And so you stand alone.
With out responsibility from
the chains that bound you
to this earth
the chains that found you
at your birth
have been cut
all ties to humanity
human sanity
have been cut
you stand alone
pretending you are not a product of a past
but this past
is long living, forever sinning
and will outlast
this current generation
Alone, you stand
upon claimed land
staring into the abyss
of a mass gravsite called Earth.
But who piled on the dirt?
With victory cry
shovel held high, the voice screams
I did this for you!
For you, my family!
For you America!
For you! For you! For you!
and our silence is our complicity
it packs the dirt,
on this massive gravesite city
unless we realize our chains
are from our silence.
no longer bound
creating from silence a sound
of our voice shouting
No!
You do not kill for me
You do not hate for me
Not!
For!
Me!
But its not the guilt upon our backs
that need force us speak out and act
But Love!
And love of life. all life.
Because this world is filled with people
in its fabricated
tapestry of lies
close your eyes
and imagine this world
with out suffering, with out violence
... with out people.
And so you stand alone.
With out responsibility from
the chains that bound you
to this earth
the chains that found you
at your birth
have been cut
all ties to humanity
human sanity
have been cut
you stand alone
pretending you are not a product of a past
but this past
is long living, forever sinning
and will outlast
this current generation
Alone, you stand
upon claimed land
staring into the abyss
of a mass gravsite called Earth.
But who piled on the dirt?
With victory cry
shovel held high, the voice screams
I did this for you!
For you, my family!
For you America!
For you! For you! For you!
and our silence is our complicity
it packs the dirt,
on this massive gravesite city
unless we realize our chains
are from our silence.
no longer bound
creating from silence a sound
of our voice shouting
No!
You do not kill for me
You do not hate for me
Not!
For!
Me!
But its not the guilt upon our backs
that need force us speak out and act
But Love!
And love of life. all life.
Because this world is filled with people
martes, 13 de noviembre de 2007
Tumaco
I spoke too soon inside my head when i arrived yesterday. I thought this was a beautiful little town on the waters edge. i was so excited to see the ocean. Alas... my day was smashed with a reality check today when i went in search of boats to float gailily around in. This town is poor. dirty. it smells. poor? very poor. i have never seen a big city this poor. Small towns, yes, worse off. with out electricity, running water, etc. The houses are built into the water on supports for lack of land. Where the water has receded it leaves a big hole of mud filled with garbage for much of the waters edge houses. Lack of resources? I think not. This is a port town. With oil. lots of oil sent from Popoyan as i learned yesterday. as well as various other things. That explains the heavy military presence. They searched my bus on the way in, and made us all stand out in the rain as they checked for... drugs? Costumed men in green are everywhere. sometimes they like to scare me when i am walking along thinking my own little thoughts... a sound hisses out at me! a snake? no. something snake like... and military uniformed has called to me from his camafloughed perch. Today they were on their best beviour. i wanted to walk around the town in search of the peninsula. about five or six of them started sweetly shouting gringa! hey gringa! and mami! at me. and whistling loudly. such nice boys. and then i do not know who to attribute this next act of flattery to, but as i was walking back to my hotel a car drove by and someone reached out and grabbed ahold of my arm. scared the shit out of me. Such nice boys....
i am getting the fuck out of here tomorrow.
i am getting the fuck out of here tomorrow.
viernes, 9 de noviembre de 2007
reading
more tidbits: I am ploughing through my history textbook in spanish, but it is slow going. So i finally cave in and checked out some books from the library in english. An interesting comparison of numbers: Chilean dirty war - 17 yrs. 3,000 political killings. Argentina 8 years- 9,000 politically motivated killings. Colombia, 1986-1994, 28,500 politically motivated killings.... it was much easier to hide under "drug war" and the government often portrayed itself as a victim cocaine and guerrila warfare. However, the violence of the state commited more atrocites than all the other dictatorships in Latin America combined. And this was just in a period of 8 years. The writer of this new book discusses the tactics taught by U.S manuals of the "climate of fear" that to combat internal conflict the government must use violence in a manner so as to terrify the community into subjugation and silence. Killing is used not only to rid the city of "problematic" people, but to intimitate through use of torture. some of the examples given are absolutely horrific. The one i can`t get out of my mind is the story of a woman coming home to find her entire family decapitated. each body was sitting in a chair with its head on the table in front of it. The hands of the body were placed where their heads should have been. The baby`s hands were too little and were nailed to its body. guesomly horrific. As i began reading this book my roommate came in and we began a discussion of media violations. For example, two weeks ago a high up leader of one of the farc factions was killed by the police. His face was plastered all over the newspapers. His dead bloody face. And let us not forget the hanging of Saddam Hussein. Shown on international television and newspapers everywhere. I need look no farther than popular culture to begin comtemplating how it is possible to decapitate a baby and make a joke out of it.
to be continued....
to be continued....
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